Feeling intimidated by the 21 page application and 61 page instruction guide?
Help is on the way!
Introducing The ObamaFilers©
For the low, low (introductory) price of just $49.95, our expert ObamaFilers© will walk you through the tedious, unnecessarily complicated and arcane process of buying your shiny new ObamaTax Policy.
That's right, only $49.95 (plus tax) gets you up to one hour* of expert advice from a trained, experienced professional. Plus, if you act now, you'll receive up to one additional hour with an ObamAppealer© (in the event that your initial application is rejected)(which it most likely will be).
Hurry, supplies (and ObamaFilers©) are limited. Call today!
*$29.95 each additional hour. Minimum anticipated time for application completion is 3.5 hours per applicant. Void where prohibited or when HHS Secretary Shecantbeserious says so. Gluten-free. Not Kosher for Passover. No warranty expressed or implied. May cause minor skin irritation. Not sold in stores. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment. Use only as directed. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Apply only to affected area. May be too intense for some viewers. Do not stamp. No postage necessary if mailed in the United States. Slippery when wet. For office use only. Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform. At participating locations only. Not the Beatles. Avoid contact with skin. Sanitized for your protection. Beware of dog. Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show. Limited time offer, call now to insure prompt delivery. You must be present to win. Keep away from fire or flame. No Canadian coins. Not recommended for children. Prerecorded for this time zone. Reproduction strictly prohibited. No solicitors. No alcohol, dogs, or horses. No anchovies unless otherwise specified. Decision of judges is final.
Help is on the way!
Introducing The ObamaFilers©
For the low, low (introductory) price of just $49.95, our expert ObamaFilers© will walk you through the tedious, unnecessarily complicated and arcane process of buying your shiny new ObamaTax Policy.
That's right, only $49.95 (plus tax) gets you up to one hour* of expert advice from a trained, experienced professional. Plus, if you act now, you'll receive up to one additional hour with an ObamAppealer© (in the event that your initial application is rejected)(which it most likely will be).
Hurry, supplies (and ObamaFilers©) are limited. Call today!
*$29.95 each additional hour. Minimum anticipated time for application completion is 3.5 hours per applicant. Void where prohibited or when HHS Secretary Shecantbeserious says so. Gluten-free. Not Kosher for Passover. No warranty expressed or implied. May cause minor skin irritation. Not sold in stores. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment. Use only as directed. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Apply only to affected area. May be too intense for some viewers. Do not stamp. No postage necessary if mailed in the United States. Slippery when wet. For office use only. Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform. At participating locations only. Not the Beatles. Avoid contact with skin. Sanitized for your protection. Beware of dog. Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show. Limited time offer, call now to insure prompt delivery. You must be present to win. Keep away from fire or flame. No Canadian coins. Not recommended for children. Prerecorded for this time zone. Reproduction strictly prohibited. No solicitors. No alcohol, dogs, or horses. No anchovies unless otherwise specified. Decision of judges is final.
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